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#cishet

4 Beiträge2 Beteiligte0 Beiträge heute
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Gurre Vildskägg

Hey, fellow cis-het folks, now that it's pride month:
When did you first realize you had LGBTQI+ people around you? How old were you, when was it?

For me, it was after high school, at a part-time job in telemarketing, I had an openly gay colleague. I'd say around 2001-ish.

#Pride#cishet#Allies
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Seb ∞

Introduce yourself. Right on!

Hi #fediverse, I'm Seb. A #neurodiverse (#audhd), #cishet #genx dude in his mid-forties and living in Canada.

#80s kid
#90s teen
#00s young adult
#10s adult
#20s wtf

Forever lost and trying to find my way.

Current interests include: #philosophy #lactofermentation #kefir #drawing #reading #selfhosting #linux #foss #gardening #cycling #mentalhealth #dropouttv #kink #democracy #ukraine #palestine #existentialdread

#introduction#introductionpost
The Chaotic Good 🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🖖

I am angry at the #NHS in ways I never thought I would be.

20 years ago last month, I got confirmation surgery from the NHS. I was put on a female ward during my recovery, and my surgery and my reason for being there wasn’t the subject of attention: my recovery was.

I can’t imagine what hay the NHS that gave me a new life would, 20 years later, find ways to not treat me or keep me safe.

And yet, here we fucking are.

I’ve upset people saying this before but fuck it, I’ll say it again.

If you are #cishet and you are not standing at my side standing shoulder to shoulder against the hate, I’m not interested. #trans

Your Autistic Life FR/EN/ES

PSA about asking trans folks about their genitals.

This one's for you. Well, if you are trans, you already know this. This is for the cis people, especially the cishet ones.

Don't ask a trans person about their genitals, ever.

"But this friend of mine was cool with it."

Yo, that was one trans person. They don't talk for the entire community. Maybe *they* were cool with your invasive questions. A lot of them won't be cool with it.

If you don't plan to bed them ever, keep your damn mouth shut.

"But, you know... it might go into that direction... 😏"

Wipe that damn smirk off your face. That it *may* go into that direction is not *proof* that it will go into that direction. They may only see you as a friend. Until you know for a fact that an encounter will happen, don't even go there.

"But I do know that they want me in this way."

Still don't!

"What????"

I'm serious. Still don't.

"But..."

If they want an encounter with you, you will know ahead of time. See, I'm not generally a jerk. Partners of mine have generally been forthcoming with the information. I've even had trans friends tell me, just on the basis of me not being a dirtbag who keeps asking invasive questions.

"What if they don't just tell me."

Use your brain. For instance, in a dating profile, if someone mentions top surgery but not bottom surgery, chances are that the bottom surgery hasn't happened yet.

"But what if we're about to discuss what they'd like me to do to them and I need to know what I'm dealing with? So that I can use the right vocabulary."

Still, don't ask.

"Are you crazy?????"

No, I'm not. Here's a way to get the information without having to ask directly. "How do you call your genitals?" The answer to this will usually be useful in two ways, you'll learn what term they want you to use, and you'll know what you're dealing with. It'll also show that you care about them.

"Wait? They don't all use the same terms?"

Nope. You cannot assume that if someone uses one term, everyone else will use the same term.

"How do you know this?"

It was imparted to me by my partners, in a couple of lectures. I'd like to avoid you getting lectured.

The above is my experience as a cis pansexual man. I've always known what I needed to know ahead of time. Even the failures I mention above are my experience, not because I did them (except for the last one) but because I was a bystander doing damage control.

Now, go forth and don't be a jerk! 😘

#PSA#trans#cishet
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